I Sound Like A Little Bitch

I don't know what to do anymore, I just feel as though we have gotten a little more separate. I mean without the drugs we are nothing or rather we have nothing to talk about. I guess it's me.. Or her.. I don't even know. I just have the sinking feeling like if we were in a relationship it would be awkward and end in like a week. Maybe she just doesn't like me and really wants someone else. I just don't want it to be weird. This is Weird. I need to grow a pair. I don't know I just have so many doubts what if I lay myself out there and it just blows up.